One in Thirty-Three

14 Oct

*Trigger Warning*: This piece deals with issues of sexual violence.

by Anonymous

I don’t really remember 8th grade very well. It was a long time ago for one thing, but I also didn’t really want to remember.

Unfortunately, I never forgot being sexually assaulted.

He was a little older, a seemingly cool and rebellious high school kid. I remember thinking how lucky I was to finally find anyone who liked me. I was never well liked, so finding a guy who was interested was a breath of fresh air. He took my breath away, first by flattering me, and then by holding me down on the floor as I struggled to get free. I said no, so he put his hand on my mouth. I tried to reach up and unlock the door to the room we were in, so he grabbed my hand and slammed it to the ground. He said I looked like I was enjoying it. He said that I wanted this. He said I shouldn’t have been such a flirt. Then, for a split second, I broke his grip and yelled for help. I am so glad someone heard me. I can’t imagine how things might have ended up otherwise.

So why am I telling this story? It is not just because I was sexually assaulted at a young age. I am telling this story because I am one of those 1 in 33 men who experienced an attempted rape, and I bet most people reading this assumed I was a woman. Some people realize that victims of rape or assault are not exclusively female, but a lot of people don’t. I am telling this story because since I started talking about what happened to me, other guys have approached me about their own experiences, and I think it is important that both male and female voices are sharing their stories.

One Response to “One in Thirty-Three”

  1. Dominique Hayes October 16, 2013 at 4:52 am #

    Thank you so, so much for writing and posting this. I argue with people about sexual violence facts and statistics, and people tell me that I’m exaggerating. That not that many people are assaulted. That women are just too touchy, and have been taught to pull “the rape card” as a knee-jerk reaction when it isn’t warranted. That men can’t be assaulted, because they always want sex. That the only (male) pedophiles assault boys/young men.

    It’s hard for anyone who’s been hurt to stand up and show their war wounds to the world. But thank you for having the courage to do so. More people need to realize that boys and men have to deal with this too–because if society is busy ignoring males who have suffered sexual assault, then they are simultaneously a) denying what these people have gone though, and b) failing to provide help/support for them.

    Oh, and one more thing before I go–//offers e-hugs//

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